Sunday, October 26, 2008

.:Here's a hand to lay on your open palm today:.

I want to go drowning with that person. I want that person to look at me with eyes filled with love and hope and the future and nothing else but wonderful things. I feel so alone and without. It's difficult to accurately describe this feeling, but I want to have my one big love. I can exist without it, but I will forever find myself wanting because I see what great people have between each other and I will desperately want that for myself, just as I do now and every day. My heart was created to be shared, and in that to be reciprocated and nurtured, but it's just sitting there, anticipating that great big love like a dirty, hungry, over-heated dog that simply wants to be allowed inside.

My issue is not that I have yet to move on. No, I am, for the most part (to put a number on it - 98%), done with my former significant other. I am, however, feeling this incredible weight of being unable to do romantically centered things with someone I feel completely comfortable with. This gives me the notion that I will die alone and sad, but I have hope, and that's what gets me through these tough days.

If you're in love, I hope you're taking it for all it is worth. Maybe I'll find mine one day, maybe I won't, but just know that you inspire me, regardless of what I may be lacking.

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